Friday, July 01, 2005


My mother-in-law, who is 76, recently got a girlfriend. She is now going to weekly movies with her friend and even traveling together with her. I'm so happy for her as for many years I wondered who and where her female friends were. Oh, she had social acquaintances, but I never heard her speak of anyone special, no one that she could call to tell the latest dirt or anyone who could give her a shoulder to cry on. There was never a special person she went shopping with and no one to call for advice. I didn't understand it as my own mother has had the same best friend since 1952 and has played cards monthly with the same group of women for almost as long.

Growing up, I'd see my mom on the phone with her best friend daily. They lived on opposite sides of town so they weren't together daily but they almost always had daily contact via the phone. Once a year they planned a getaway to another city to do their Christmas shopping. When both had kids that were grown and gone, they took trips together, sometimes the husbands came along, sometimes they went on their own. They've been through everything together, the raising of kids, weddings, divorce, the death of parents and they now are stepping into the scary world of old age together. And for that I am very grateful.

My mother doesn't live close to me and her best friend is there to help now that her memory is failing. She watches her like a hawk and sends me letters telling the details of what my mother's life is like now. She misses hearing the things my mother can't remember such as details of her children's lives or about the grandchildren so I try to fill her in as best I can. She's there to take her to card club and there to remind her of appointments and of what the doctor said but mainly she is there, as she has always been, with her love and friendship never wavering.

Long ago a friend told me "men come and go but your women friends will always be there" and I realize the truth in that statement when I see my mother's life. She still goes to her monthly card club and still talks to her best friend daily. Her world has narrowed in many ways, but the love of her best friend is as full as ever. That's why I'm so pleased to see that my mother-in-law finally has a girlfriend, it's never too late to enjoy the delight and comfort of a good friend.


Related Posts with Thumbnails